« Home | French rioters demand EU funding » | "Signor Berlusconi, are you in favour of war in Ir... » | It's all in the nose... » | Explosion in Jordan television studio » | How the President of the United States stole Chris... » | My message to George was "sexed up" - God » | Scientists discover free energy source to replace oil » | Hu Jintao awarded doctorate » 

Tuesday, November 15, 2005 

Errata Corrige

We regret to inform our readers that there has been an error in our previous report of the parrot which allegedly died of Avian flu in quarantine in the UK.
In reality, it was not a parrot at all, but a Taiwanese finch.
Consequently, our report of the first case of Avian flu to hit the UK should actually have read:
"This finch is no more! 'E has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is maker! 'E's a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! ... 'Is metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'E's off the twig! 'E's kicked the bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisibile!
THIS IS AN EX-TAIWANESE FINCH!"

We apologise for any inconvenience caused by the error.