Saved From The Skip

It's official. David Cameron (pictured above during a photoshoot for Sexy MPs: The Lady's Magazine) will be withdrawing his Conservative Party from the EPP-ED because it's "just not sexy enough" for his image.

Cameron, who was voted 92 in a poll of the 100 sexiest men on the planet, believes that his association with the straight-laced, grey-suited and somewhat po-faced Christian Democrats in the European Parliament may have cost him several precious sex-appeal points in the contest, resulting in such comparative wusses as Leonardo Di Caprio and Brad Pitt beating him in the sexy stakes.

"I've been trying to impress upon my European partners the need to move away from their traditional Argyll socks, paisley ties and silver monocles", he said in an exclusive interview with Saved From The Skip. "But there's no point, they clearly lack the vision to truly appreciate the value of style in today's politics."

The British Conservatives are expected to pull out of the EPP-ED later this month, and take up their natural seats on the sexy side of the house, alongside Illona Staller (aka Cicciolina), Baby Pozzi, Dolly Buster (below), and, naturally, Alessandra Mussolini.